I wanted to actually rant about what I think, but then I think it will cause big changes if anyone were to know about this. Let's just say it is about my personality. My very weird personality.
I was scolded by someone after being brutally transparent about what I feel. Someone special to me. After that, I was feeling very lost, and DANG! I was just nagged by my mum for not sleeping at this hour while I am still sick. Aih. So potong-stim.
OK, let's continue. I was feeling very lost. Then I came up here wanted to rant for awhile. That is when I thought about this. My blog title for about 2 years plus - 'Attraction, Distraction'.
The attraction I got from the way I express myself. Without firewall. With DMZ enabled. All kinds of rubbish go in and out just like this - whoosh. Thus, I infect and got infected by different viruses, trojans, spyware, and whatever which is NOT good; and thus has caused me some precious connection with some real important or prefered host.
When I lost my first prefered host, I did not really quite notice it until a peer sent me some warnings. I was feeling seriously down. A major part of me was in a EMOTION_DISORDER mode. I started coniguring a firewall and did disable DMZ.
Then today, when I went out yumchar with some buddies, I again slipped some very very hurtful things. I feel really really terrible now after I thought of what I have said. Serious awful. Feels like the @wFul virus has attacked me or something. I hope I doesn't lose this precious connection to this host.
The main thing which I want to talk about today, was actually about Y. As what you have read up there, I spilt the 'unspiltable' to B, and B smartly told, or enquire Y about what I have told B. At the moment I told B about what happen is because I did not know what to do with the situation. Well, maybe I have spilt more than that I guess, but the least thing I expect was the tracert of B to Y.
Currently Listening: - Slow Jam (feat. Monica) - Usher
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